A successful mediation is one in which the parties reach a resolution that both can agree on. You will not get all of what you want, and neither will the other party. The point is for all parties to have ownership of the process, and in doing so, come up with an agreement they can both live with comfortably. It is a cooperative effort by both parties and their attorneys to settle their issues. Mediation has many benefits, particularly saving both time and attorney's fees.

The Process of Mediation

The first meeting will likely be spent collecting information. Each party's positions, needs, and wants are important. The attorneys will review the information to look at all possible solutions. Again, they explore a whole range of settlement options - and alternatives.
Negotiations can begin after all of the information is brought together. It is important that all of the information has been gathered and looked at so that realistic and fair proposals for settlement can be considered.
This is the time when it is especially important to be willing to compromise, and to remember that winning every little point is not the goal, that the higher goals should always be kept in mind. The parties meet with a mediator to learn their rights and responsibilities under the law. Everyone knows and understands what is expected of them before things go forward. The goal is an agreement that includes a resolution of all of the issues.
Mediation is a non-adversarial means to work out divorce or separation issues. These issues can include custody, time-sharing, alimony, child support and the many other issues which arise in divorce and separation.
Couples can use mediation at any stage of the separation and divorce process - even couples who have previously divorced through the court system and wish to resolve new problems can benefit from mediation.

Advantages of Mediation

• personal control over the settlement.
• less emotional trauma on the spouses and any children involved.
• not as time consuming as escalating court battles.
• not as expensive as the court process, due to more effective use of the attorney's time and active involvement of clients.
• can even eliminate conflicts before they arise.
• mediation is private
• helps avoid the distress and embarrassment of a public court battle
• studies show that couples who have worked together through a mediator are over three times more likely to uphold the terms of their agreement than couples who have divorced through the adversarial system.