Preparing for the First Meeting with Your Attorney
If you have reached the point where you are considering contacting a
family law attorney, you are probably undergoing an emotional and stressful
time in your life. Though it will be difficult, you will need to sort
out your emotions from the facts in order to proceed because even in
family law matters, the court will use a rational, business like approach.
The advice and involvement of an experienced family law attorney can
help.
The job of your attorney is to use your knowledge of the facts to counsel
you on the relevant issues of your case and to help you approach your
situation with reason rather than emotion. Many people are surprised
by what they learn during an initial consultation because they don't
anticipate all the factors that may affect the likelihood of achieving
a successful outcome. How could they? An experienced attorney is trained
to apply the law to your particular situation and to work with you to
get the best results possible.
After you decide to make an appointment for your initial consultation,
create a list or a timetable of the events that caused you to turn to
a lawyer for your family law case. During the discussion, you may have
to address several upsetting issues and the lawyer may ask you some
disturbing or pointed questions. You do not have to worry about shocking
the lawyer - an experienced attorney has probably already heard a similar
story. It is important for you to be forthcoming and honest. If your
attorney doesn't know all the facts, he or she can't be as effective
as possible.
Give your attorney a head start on the discovery process by preparing
for your initial consultation. Gather as much factual information as
possible. Remember, your communication with your attorney is privileged
and protected by the attorney/client relationship.
This is a lengthy list. Do your best to gather all of the following
information:
- Copies of
your marriage and birth certificates.
Date of marriage
and timeline of events in marriage.
- Information about any prior marriage of either
spouse, including a certified copy of the divorce decree.
- A copy of any domestic contracts (e.g., a prenuptial
agreement).
- Information about any previous legal proceedings
between the spouses or involving any of the children.
- Dates and particulars about any previous separations,
attempts at reconciliation, or marriage counseling.
- The name of your employer and your spouse's employer,
including dates of employment.
- Social security and driver's license numbers.
- Copies of your (single or joint) income tax returns
for the last three years.
- Copies of your last three pay stubs (if you work
outside the home).
- Note your spouse's income and other household income.
- Name of bank, saving and checking accounts numbers,
amounts and whose names are on the accounts.
- Stocks, bonds and other investment information.
- The value of a pension, whose name it is in and
when they began to contribute to the pension.
- Note other valuable items such as jewelry, artwork
and other collections.
- Purchase date, purchase price, remaining balances
and current value of real estate holdings.
- List all debts including amount owed, to whom,
account numbers, when they were incurred, when due and whose name
they are in.
- Education and employment background of both parties.
- Names and ages of children.
Note
any "skeletons" that may be at issue, such as drug/alcohol
abuse, if either party ever committed a crime, domestic abuse, or sexual
misconduct.
Remember, the information you provide your attorney is protected by
the attorney/client privilege. It is imperative that you be fully honest
with your attorney so he or she can help you.
The
other important thing to keep in mind is to ask questions. Make a list
so you don't forget to ask the things that really matter to you. The
adage, "There are no dumb questions," is true. Your attorney
does not expect you to understand all of the issues or legal terms and
will do his or her best to avoid complicated legal language. But if
you don't know the meaning of a legal term or any legal procedure, ask
for clarification. You need to understand everything that is going on
so you can make the best decisions possible.
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